The “Choice Trick” – How Giving Kids Small Choices Reduces Power Struggles

Ever had your child say “No!” to everything? It’s not always defiance. It’s often a natural push for independence. When children feel powerless, they push back. But you can guide cooperation by giving them a sense of control.

✅ The Hack: Offer Limited Choices

Instead of giving open-ended commands like:

"Go get dressed!" Try:
"Do you want the blue shirt or the red one?"

By offering two options, your child feels empowered—but you're still in charge of the outcome.

🧠 Why It Works:

Children are developing autonomy. Small choices help them feel respected and reduce the need to resist. This builds trust, confidence, and smoother routines.

✨ Real-Life Examples:

Situation	Instead of Saying	Try Saying This
Getting dressed	"Hurry up and get dressed"	"Red shirt or blue one today?"
Mealtime	"Eat your veggies"	"Carrots or cucumbers with your meal?"
Leaving the house	"Put your shoes on"	"Sneakers or sandals today?"

👪 Parent Wins:

Reduces power struggles
Fewer meltdowns
Builds mutual respect